Matha Pitha Guru Daivam

As you grow up, you learn more by observing than by being told, this is true of all of us, though there are exceptions.

One of the things that I have observed in my father is the exceptional love for his parents. Appa has and can never say anything bad/negative about his parents(in general Appa does not complain and if he does it is more about the situation than the person).

When he was working, every year summer vacations were spent at Trikkur, he visited as often as he could. Post-retirement his home and heart were where his parents were. After Thatha's demise the love continues. Every year the month before the Thevasam is spent by Appa with more austerity than usual(will not shave etc). And he unfailing does the Tharpanam every month after 10:30 a.m. etc observing all niyamas.

Relatives and friends have often questioned Appa bout doing these rituals, why should we do it, what will we gain etc. People also tend to tell him albeit indirectly it is time to let go of all these binding rituals. Appa listens carefully, he tells them what he knows. His beliefs are totally unshakeable.

For one to remember their parents/ancestors, one inherently needs to be proud of the lineage and way of life inherited. If something is important to us, we will spend our attention on it - our children, garden, friends, dog. While we will do anything for our children, it is a bane today that we do not have any time for our parents/elders - time to call and listen, time to do something special for them, basically giving a bit of care back to them. Our parents especially those with NRII children are orphaned in their old age when they really need support.

While we have time for a lot of things(Facebook, movies, parties, sports etc), we do a lot of cooking and entertaining otherwise, we don't seem to have time for parents - alive or dead. Sad but true.